Logical thinking

So the question is, what would logical Kristie do?

We will always tell ourselves a hundred times, a thousand times, a million times that everything will be alright in the end. Good will prevail. It's not wrong, but that is what we tell ourselves to accept whatever bad that is happening to us and not make to move to change things. Logically, I would want myself to be brave, and do something about it. To make my life better, drop things that are not good to me if I can't change it. But somewhere, deep down, all I am thinking is what if? what if it was a wrong move? So I eventually did not do anything about it. Which of course did not help in my predicament.

When things finally got better and though I got hurt in it, I was relieved. I decided to take things as it was and continue living life. But I was afraid that I would be lonely. I dwell in that thought for a few days before finally at my lowest when logical thinking saved me.

All I thought was, why should I be so upset after the situation has ended? I can definitely do better, and I can definitely life live normally again. I can be happy. Life goes on and I am still capable of making decisions myself. Then I decided to let go and move on. Because I felt that there was nothing I could do anyway. Other than being cool about the next phase.

Things did get better, I started being who I am again, until one day things took a wrong turn for unknown reasons.. It took me by surprise, and caused a whirlwind of emotions which was unnecessary just as the whole situation was. But again after some talking to the next most logical person I know, who said "be the better person." I did.

Logical me won again. "Why should I always be the one who gets trampled over?"

I realised that as a person who feels so much, it is really important to regain and find back the self-worth and confidence in myself. Even if making myself look damn good to feel better, I guess finding myself back is super important, and losing myself over something I cannot entirely control is just plain stupid. Pray that I shall continue to take things in my stride, and be a better person.

"Go through dark times and come out even better. "

Here's to looking forward to the future, and continue learning to control my state and environment!
*inhale deeply & exhale. ahhhhh~*

Personality Types

There are countless of personality tests around. So I'm trying the 16 Personalities Factor test!
I've done it once before awhile back, and reading the results let me understand myself better. And since i'm on the road to rediscovery and how to better manage myself and my emotions, no harm trying again!

* taking the test in progress....*

The results are in! im an INFP (introverted, intuitive, feeling, prospecting) 
Variant: Turbulent
Role: Diplomat

Well, the overview says that there is only 4% of us in the world population, and are easily misunderstood. We also choose to believe in the best of everything. We follow a set of morals or principles that we set for ourselves. When we do something, we don't expect any forms of return.

We also tend to drift away from people.

more on here: INFP
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I guess it is kind of true. I find myself stuck in between social groups. And I don't belong solely in one group. Although i want to be part of the conversation/activities, I tend to drift out and listen more. Maybe it gives the impression that I'm being anti-social. Sometimes I get stuck in this awkward situation where since I am not truly in one, I am left sitting on the bench.

I like the idea of having close friends, friends that I can talk to. That I would listen to their woes even though i have mine. Friends that i would try to understand, and help whenever I can. But I dont like to really share all my deep thoughts and stuff with people, and i keep feelings generalised. Unless I am really close to them. Or at times, there are just too many things going on in my head, that i can't phrase my words properly.

I enjoy spending time alone, like watching a movie or just sitting around or window shopping. time to gather my thoughts and re-think decisions. But I also enjoy having friends around... i'm just weird la maybe.


BUT i guess such things give us an idea to why sometimes we are like that. Even though it might not be a proper explanation. I still believe that each individual is unique and cannot be understood solely based on such tests.


Shall end off with my favourite quote that has many meanings to it. A year ago, I stumbled onto this quote and I thought long and hard about it. And somehow it relates to me.

All that is gold does not glitter; not all those who wander are lost; the old that is strong does not wither; deep roots are not reached by the frost.

J. R. R. Tolkien

okay, thats all for my friday post.
be kind folks. :)

The feels.

“When you love someone… truly love them, friend or lover, you lay your heart open to them. You give them a part of yourself that you give to no one else, and you let them inside a part of you that only they can hurt—you literally hand them the razor with a map of where to cut deepest and most painfully on your heart and soul. And when they do strike, it’s crippling—like having your heart carved out. It leaves you naked and exposed, wondering what you did to make them want to hurt you so badly when all you did was love them. What is so wrong with you that no one can keep faith with you? That no one can love you? To have it happen once is bad enough… but to have it repeated? Who in their right mind would not be terrified of that?”

Been feeling kinda shitty and emotional lately. But nonetheless, I pray that November would be a good month. because school is going to get tough and i have exams in Dec. I guess December would be a tough month to pass. hm.

but, without the bitterness, success would not be sweet. :)