February!

February is coming to an end. A rather short month I would say. And needless to say, filled with all the unnecessary drama. Though I've learned to cope a little, but there is still this little part of me that is still the same.

There was this divine humor that struck me this month too. Too much to handle really. Many said that it was not my fault, but I somehow let that happen. And I kinda feel sorry. but bros before anything i understand that. :)

February 14, Valentines day. I'll be honest and say that actually, I've never celebrated one, even when I had a boyfriend. So, I kinda freaked out when people did ask me out. And I decided to send HW off to the land down under together with my secondary school mates. Went back to visit old colleagues at the hotel and headed to get some drinks with those mates again.
It was pretty weird that THAT GUY tried all the funny shit on me the day before, but ultimately I don't see myself as being able to communicate with him properly. But well, curiosity killed the cat and I learned a traumatising lesson.

Actually this whole dating again thing has been a bit traumatising, and honestly though, I don't even know how to go about doing all these any more. But I do know that as I grow older I dont have that much time and energy to be so young and reckless.

SO.

CHINESE NEW YEAR. YAY.

CNY was really busyyyyy but i was so glad to be able to meet up with all my relatives. YAY. So so tiring but really, its will worth it :)

Sweet soup for a smacking good year. :) 

Secrets

We all have secrets we'll never tell. Things that we keep from people. In order to protect what we have, in order to live the life we imagined for ourselves. Unexpected things happen all the time.

But these secrets though, they'll always find a way back to taunt us, to remind us of why it is so important to keep that away from people we care about. We may share with others eventually, and have them swear to secrecy. But word gets around.

It's really funny how we do things in the heat of the moment, and swore to keep it a secret. We swore to forget, and swore to never talk about it again. But the thing is, we rarely ever keep our promises to ourselves. We never forget about them, we share with others to lighten our 'load'. But the question is can we really trust them?

on a sidenote, school started and I got shit handed to me on my first day. I can't do anything about it nor can i say anything about. I just keep my mouth shut whenever I'm with people from school now. I feel prey to a girl whom I thought was trustworthy, but she put words into my mouth. So i honestly hope karma gets back to you.

So glad I chose to push away everyone on Vday and spent it with my sec school friends. Friends who watched you grow up, and not judge. Even until now. So glad really. (but weird things really do happen and I guess i make the wrong choices too sometimes)


i'll update again with pictures soon. i hope. x

"Be vulnerable but strong"

It's so tiring, too tiring to even deal with all these unnecessary drama in my life. Right now, at this age. I can't even....

School has started for ONE day, and I have to deal with all these unnecessary shit flung at me. And the worst part is that I don't even have a chance to defend myself. I cannot even say anything about it. They said time will tell, time will show. But this wait is torturous. I have to be present and act like as if I don't know anything, with my reputation and credibility hanging on the line.

I thought I left all these drama when I graduated from Poly but I guess it's quite impossible to do so. Never did I thought that someone would do this to me, even invite me to her own 'territory' to do this. And all I can say to her is just, I hope you have a taste of your own medicine. Karma's a bitch definitely.

Just immature rich kid problems, we commoners cannot relate to. oh well. life.

I honestly hope that things get better and my decision to stay quiet as of now is right.




side note: dealing with too much shit that even though i found out what happened months back did not even affect me. But I definitely hope it stops there and will not get any worse. because it would just damage the reputation of that person. and boy you know how fast words spread.

I guess, if it started the same way it would probably end the same way. What's the point of trying to hard to make things different, trying so hard to be nice to people I am not sure would reciprocate the gesture. What's the point if everything would just be a repetitive and vicious cycle.

I'm just waiting, waiting for school to start so that I can be busy, real busy.